The raider wanted to know what happened next. Fiona told the story of how she had to remove one of General Pollux’s eyes to unlock a terminal. It’s an incredibly uncomfortable sequence that reminds me of a certain scene from Dead Space 2, but with very dark comedy instead of pure horror. The only way to do it justice is to describe it in amazing detail.
Fiona picks up a spork (or is it a fpoon?) to do the dirty deed with, but she gets startled when Rhys yelps, causing her to squish Pollux’s right eye. The next eye is removed successfully… but the sequence is played from Pollux’s perspective.
Fiona used the eye to access two messages. One was for Pollux from Athena
(who had creepy orange eyes for some reason), who was sent by Atlas to kill Pollux. She also mentioned something about Gortys is Old Haven.
The second message was from Pollux asking whoever found the bunker to… shut off the stasis drive on the storage capsule he was resting in. That’s so dark, you can’t help but laugh. Well, the least we can do is figure out what this Gortys thing is, so that our accidental murder of Pollux isn’t totally in vain…
Suddenly, Rhys fell over the railing and into Pollux’s capsule, causing an explosion of blood.
Raider: “Wait, what?”
Rhys says that there wasn’t that much blood. In Rhys’ version of events, he didn’t fall on Pollux. Rhys fell because he was arguing with Handsome Jack, who scared him.
Jack isn’t really getting the fact that he’s dead.
The party tries to leave for Old Haven, only to be attacked by Hyperion Moonshots AND Rakks. Rhys gets a clever idea to use a giant Rakk Hive-
-as cover from one of the Moonshots. But the caravan is in such bad shape that it loses all of its wheels from the nitro boost. Rhys and Vaughn fly out of the back of the caravan, which was torn open by Rakks.
Vaughn realizes that he’s actually excited by all of the danger, but when Rhys’ hand suddenly beeps, Vaughn gets startled and excuses himself to urinate. Totally unrelated.
We lost Loader Bot during the Rakk/Moonshot chase. Also, Rhys lost a shoe.
Yvette called and promised to send whatever she could.
Vaughn reemerged shirtless with his shirt tied around his head. He’s thin, but cut. He installed a fitness bike in his office. Jack was kinda jealous because “saving the world” doesn’t leave a lot of time for the gym.
Rhys tried to tell Vaughn that Jack was in his head.
As Rhys and Vaughn began their trudge across the desert, Hugo’s car crash-landed near them. Hugo gave them shovels so that they could dig their own graves. Nice…ish?
Vaughn said that Hugo offered him a deal, but he’d had to have betrayed Rhys, so he refused.
Hugo held them at gunpoint. While Hugo tried to figure out who to work Hyperion’s most advanced gun because “manuals are for amateurs”, Jack upgraded Rhys’ ECHO-Eye so that he could hack the gun or Hugo’s car. I hacked the car to run his ass over, but he still gets in it to chase Rhys and Vaughn down. Happily, LB comes back to the rescue! “I missed you.”
A side effect of having Jack in his head: Jack can use Rhys’ Hyperion arm…
The guys headed for Old Haven, where they found the old Atlas bunker… but August and his men found them.
Unlocked Deal With a Ghost, Till Death Do Us Part, and A Plan Came Together. 10/35
This game can have some technical issues, like tall long loading times, and missing or mistimed dialog cues.
Catchin’ a Ride
The ladies sought repairs on the caravan in their hometown of Hollow Point. And who would they go to but Scooter?
Lacking the cash for the cost of repairs, Fiona instead signs a racing contract with the mechanic for his sponsorship. He told her that there was a sub-clause about explosions that she could ignore because he stole it from Torgue.
A couple of bounty hunters came in looking for the ladies, but Scooter didn’t rat them out. Even though the hunters roughed him up a little…
The ladies returned to Felix’s house. A person in a hood ripped down one of Fi’s wanted posters.
After the ladies found some money, homemade grenades, and a bullet and elemental upgrade for Fi’s derringer that Felix left for them, the hunters came after them.
Fiona shoots Finch with an electric bullet and Sasha attacks Kroger with a frying pan because she was making a sandwich. The girls squirrel out of there with Kroger giving chase, but then a shield comes flying at him.
Unlocked Funeral Crashers. 11/35
Scooter’s letting Janey take over some of his shops because his chain is getting too big for him to manage on his own.
One crazy chase sequence later, and the ladies flee to Scooter’s garage. Athena comes walking in…
Janey: “Oh, hey hon.”
She kisses Athena, who has her hood down and doesn’t look/sound all that scary now.
Scooter wants to know if they kiss like that a lot. Athena looks displeased.
The QTEs remind me of Shenmue.
But with a lot more guns and explosions.
Unlocked Classic Reflexes. 12/35
Kroger said that lots of people shoot Finch, but he wasn’t counting on elemental damage. Pfft.
What kind of Pandoran bounty hunters are you?
Scooter recognized Fi from Bossanova’s Death Rally.
Felix left an ECHO for the girls warning them to change their names and move because of a woman named… Vallory.
Video Game Journals 
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