“A Sinister Planet Threatens the Galaxy!”
Metroid II: Return of Samus | System: Nintendo 3DS (Virtual Console) | Developer: Nintendo R&D 1 | Publisher: Nintendo |Original Platform: Game Boy | Released (North America): November 1991 | Released (Japan): January 21, 1992 | Released (Europe): May 21, 1992 | Played From: December 14, 2014 – May 4, 2016
This game is hard, but feels familiar.
I should have read the manual before playing. The game does not provide any in-game backstory once started.
That backstory? Samus is sent on a genocide mission to the Metroid home planet SR388 by the Galactic Federation in order to prevent space pirates from utilizing the species as a weapon. That is why the game keeps count of the number of Metroids that Samus has to kill: forty-seven. It seems like there should be more…
As in the first game on the Nintendo Entertainment System, Samus collects upgrades over the course of her adventure, such as the iconic Morph Ball.
It’s Morph Ball bomb time. But then, I got lost.
In her suit, Samus is 180 pounds and almost six feet tall. Does that mean that her suit weighs over 50 pounds?
The Zeta Metroids look a lot like a certain sci-fi/horror franchise’s xenomorphs.
Missile Command
I got a new missile expansion.
I just restarted the game and began following a FAQ.It’s going much more quickly and smoothly this time. I’m finding Energy Tanks and Ice Beams…
Some games are just more enjoyable to play with a guide by your side. It’s not a failing of the gamer if that’s the best way that they can enjoy the title. We could argue as to whether or not it’s a failing of the game itself, though…
I even found a Spider Ball. It rules because it lets you crawl along walls and ceilings, but the controls are kind of tricky.
This is a totally different route than I was taking before.
Got the Varia Suit. It also changes the appearance of her Morph Ball and Spider Ball. It looks weirdly fetus-esque.
I finally got back to the caves. I forgot how to use the Spider Ball to climb back up that vertical shaft.
This game is hard to navigate because it has no minimap or map stations, and because it’s an old Game Boy game, there are only four colors to differentiate between levels.
Metroids Left: 26
These Morph Ball puzzles annoy me.
Got the Space Jump and the Plasma Beam. It’s a laser.
Metroids Left: 22
I killed some more Metroids in an area with some dangerous plants.
Metroids Left: 16. Lookit me go!
The title theme is actually kind of cool. It’s just slow to get going.
I accidentally saved over a ton of my progress. I hate this game. Why do I put myself through this?
I died and accidentally wrote over my restore point. Hey, Nintendo, since you’re trying so hard to destroy the emulation scene, why not give us, oh, I don’t know, multiple restore points?
I started out at 16 Metroids left. Now I have to work from when I had 22 left. At least I have FAQs.
The only reason why I got this game is because I had Club Nintendo points. CN was about to go away at the time. I thought that an older handheld Metroid may be good. I was wrong. SO HORRIBLY WRONG
Metroids Left: 19…
I worked my way back up to where I was before, despite the kind of bad controls and spikes. There’s a room full of them before a room containing an especially dangerous Zeta Metroid.
Metroids Left: 10. Almost there…
Got the Screw Attack.
Metroids Left: Six
This late in the game, Samus encounters her first Omega Metroid, an evolution of the Zeta. The Omegas are even uglier than the Zetas.
These optional areas have some mildly cool and creepy BGM.
You can’t pause during the final boss fight! I’m gonna hate this game to the very end.
You can kill the Metroid Queen two ways:
1. Shooting her with a lot of missiles.
2. Stunning her by shooting her in the mouth with a missile. Then, roll up into her mouth as the Morph Ball, and use the bombs on her. This supposedly does less damage than her biting and projectile attacks.
Samus shows the Queen who the biggest bitch around really is.
I find that refraining from standing flush against the back wall helps. It’s easier to hit her mouth that way.
The music that plays after you kill her is slightly cool.
The game pulls off some foreshadowing by showing you an egg before you enter the Metroid lair.
After you beat the Queen, you find the hallway that the egg is in. A baby Metroid hatches out of it, and squeaks cutely as it follows Samus around. Too bad she killed your mom, kid.
It clears out some debris for Samus as she leaves the cave system and goes back topside to return to her ship. As for… the baby? It plays a part in Super Metroid and Metroid: Other M.
Time: 3:36
I missed a single Missile Expansion.
Final Thoughts
My opinion on this game hasn’t changed since I played through it. The game has good intentions, but suffers from the limitations of the GB. The areas tend to be very samey. The game is purported to be more playable on the Game Boy Color and Super Game Boy, but the N3DS VC release is faithful to the GB version as a fault.
Probably the best things about the game are the soundtrack and atmosphere. As I was talking about the game with a friend years ago, we agreed that the game has a certain something.
There are two remakes, one fan-made, the other official. General consensus is that both of them make the original obsolete, but there are some who still prefer it to the remakes.
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